"Each time you buy your love a gift
they gain some goods they don't declare."
said Ima Heirach, quoted for the Revenue.

"All income should be taxed,
so we intend to introduce
the 'extra purchase' rule.

Say you buy your girlfriend flowers,
one time in three,
you'll buy an extra bunch
and post it off to us.

And should you buy romantic meals,
one time in three,
you'll pay for one of us
to join you at the trough.

And, er, if you and she, um, yes,
well, that's not our business, yet.
But we'll tax the consequences,
when they're fully grown."